19
Jan
10

Love is…

So this is the auto-tunerrific drank buyin’ hood-circus ringleader T-Pain and his absurdly normal wife Amber. Even her name is a suburban, public high school type of normal.  I mean, the woman looks an “Amber.” But then again, T-Pain looks like the name on his birth certificate might just actually be “T-Pain.”

In any relationship, it might be too much to assume that two people are honestly “in love”, but for some reason, mismatched couples in public relationships give me hope that that old-school ‘so-and-so’ & ‘so-and-so’ carved into tree bark encircled by a sloppy over-sized heart  type love isn’t dead yet. I couldn’t tell you why, because in many cases, they end terribly. Either way, its amusing to see. Let’s take a look back at a few.

(Flavor Flav & Brigitte Nielsen)

I didn’t like this one. There was a strange “this is my pet Flavor Fav” type of vibe there. Plus, they liked to kiss on camera, which was like watching a car wreck in slow motion every single time it happened.

(Nick Cannon & Mariah Carey)

It doesn’t bother me when people win the lottery.  So why should this? Getting away with murder is kind of like winning the lottery.

(Heidi Klum & Seal)

So you would pretty much HAVE to be Seal to pull this one.

(Russel Simmons & Porschla Coleman)

Apparently, these two have broken up or  are on the rocks. Either way… I guess once you’ve been married to Kimora Lee you have no choice but to do anything humanly possible to stay in the league.

(Ren & Stimpy)

The dog looked like a poorly drawn cat and the cat looked like a poorly drawn dog. Together, they single-handedly allowed Nickelodeon to ride the fine line between tastelessness and… tastelessness. This show deserves some type of award. It was so very, very good to me.

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2 Responses to “Love is…”


  1. 1 The Perfect Perch
    January 20, 2010 at 9:01 pm

    Very funny and insightful. Ren and Stimpy broke all the rules of being a “kid show” anyway. Doesn’t Nickelodeon play “KID SHOWS”?? That show should have came with a WARNING. Anywho, you are wrong for talking about Seal, isn’t he talented or something… that’s attractive, right?

  2. 2 bianca
    January 22, 2010 at 2:52 pm

    frankly, i love seal and heidi.
    NEVER liked ren and stimpy. together or apart.


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